WASHINGTON -Begin transmission.
At approximately five past noon on April 20th a photo of Walter the Bulldog was uploaded to a prominent social media outlet that has requested their name be withheld. Ths photo quickly went viral, clocking nearly 5 Million views per hour just hours after being uploaded. It is being reported that viewing this image will cause delays to work and social life due to viewers losing all ambition and sense of time while gazing upon it. The CDC (Center for Dog Content) urged the public not to view the image, calling the effects “a health crisis” with viewers reportedly spending hours looking at it, neglecting to meet deadlines, eat, or in extreme cases, breathe. I will now attempt to describe the image to you, dear readers, so that you may not have to view it yourself.
End of Transmission.
